I haven't done anything this stupid since I drove a 1981 Ford Granada over a hill going 90 miles per hour. Who in their right mind throws their inner thoughts into the nebulous that is the internet? What kind of superiority complex does it take to think anyone would want to read the musings of a satirical 25 year old with a penchant for the theatrical?
The truth is I need this. I don't need you to like it. I don't even need you to read it. But I need to know its out there. I need to know that my thoughts have a voice... or at least a semi-permanent URL to call home. And the way I see it, if there is room in this world for Celebrity Tweets and TMZ, there is room for me.
Let's get a few pleasantries out the way:
Number 1. Chances are at some point I am going to say something that offends you. You need to know that I am okay with that. I am fully aware that my views on everything from God to the environment are no longer politically correct or mainstream. I know you may look at me as a bigot, Neanderthal, or what have you. This is fine, as I probably look at you as blind, ignorant, or a liberal hippie.
Number 2. This is not directed at any one person or any one event in my life. If you read something I write and feel like I am targeting you, calm down; take a deep breath; and get over yourself. This is hard for some people to comprehend, but the entire world doesn't revolve around you. For those that have trouble with this idea, I will be kind enough to use names when I'm venting about something or someone specific. You don't have to read what I'm writing. That is the beauty of the internet. There are millions of other pages you can go and visit.
Number 3. This is my therapy, not yours. If you want to comment on my posts, be my guest. If I don't like it, I'll most likely respond. If it really rubs me the wrong way, I'll hack your computer; drop an e-bomb; and make sure you aren't on the internet for at least a week. You have been warned.
Number 4. This is how I am choosing to deal with everything going on in my life right now. As such, I cannot guarantee how frequent or for how long I will keep this up. As much as I'd like to say I am blogging to bring enlightenment to you all and better the world, I'd be lying. I'm blogging to quiet the voices in my head.
If you can handle all of this, buckle up and enjoy the ride. If not, please return from hence you came by pressing ALT + F4.
